Tuesday, February 3, 2015

For my husband, on our Anniversary.

Marriage is hard work sometimes.
If someone tells you it's not, they're a liar...or they're a newlywed.
At some point you're going to want to smack some sense into your partner, you won't, but you'll really want to. You'll argue about stupid stuff. You'll get mad at something they did or didn't do. You'll feel frustration at the words they did or didn't say to you. You will want to scream at the top of your lungs into the night sky because they're driving you flipping crazy. Or maybe thats just me.
Then, you'll want to hug them tight and never let go. You'll want to kiss them and tell them how much you love them. Tears will form as you look into their eyes tell them you never want experience a day in this life without them by your side. You forget about all of the fights and frustrations because that person is the one you choose to share your life with.
Ten years ago I married my husband. I was 17 and he was only four days past his 18th birthday. Two crazy teenagers making a very adult decision. Our families were not thrilled. Our friends were...I don't know. I didn't ask because I am sure I wouldn't have wanted to hear the answer. I know for a fact that many, many people thought we were making a huge mistake and were bound for divorce within a couple of years. I am not passing judgement on those who thought that, I say it because I know I would have had those same thoughts. Regardless, we married on February 4, 2005 four months before our high school graduation.

Since that time we have had good times, bad times, and times somewhere in between. We have moved 9 times, completed a combination of 5 college degrees, and brought 3 children into this world. I think what is unique about our marriage is the fact that we basically grew up together within the bounds of our relationship. We have been asked, individually and on more than one occasion, if we feel like we missed out on our youth because we were married and had kids. Looking back over the last 10 years, I can honestly say the answer is no. Sure there were times we had moments of disappointment or minimal regret, but it always disappeared as quickly as it came. I am grateful that I didn't have to date the wrong guy before I found the right one. I am grateful that I didn't have to live in dorms or an apartment with crappy roommates. We didn't have to go through all the messy parts of finding someone while learning to become an adult. We thrust ourselves into adulthood and just dealt with the messes together.

I will openly admit that it hasn't always been easy. We definitely picked a very difficult path to begin our adulthood. I wouldn't want my own children to choose what we chose. I realize I am kind of rambling here, sorry. The point I am trying to make is this: we did it. We did it and I wouldn't go back and change it for the world. Not just because we have three amazing children together, but because I get to share my life, my every day, with a man who really knows me. The worst parts of me, all of the bad decisions I have made, my stupid jokes, and when I laugh at myself telling those stupid jokes, he accepts it all and loves me unconditionally. I want for everyone what I have with Cole. Someone you can binge watch Netflix with, eat midnight ice cream in bed, rip farts in front of, travel the world with, and build a life of joy and laughter. I am grateful every day that we made that crazy decision 10 years ago, and we have the rest of eternity to make even more crazy decisions. I can't wait to see what the next decade brings for us.
I love you Cole, until the day after forever.


  1. I love you two crazy cats. I'm happy to share my birthday with you dudes. This was beautifully written!

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